Oh beautiful for heroes proved
In liberating strife
Who more than self, their country loved
And mercy more than life
America, America may God thy gold refine
'Til all success be nobleness
And every gain divined
This year, as Veteran's Day approached, something moved me to let go of most of the things I have carried with me since I met R in my senior year of high school when we were just 17 years old. I realized that those things had finally made their way to my heart and that I didn't need their physical presence anymore, taking up an entire shelf in my hall closet. Notice that I said "most of the things." I did keep a few things but made an open space in my shelves and in my life, 20 years after R wrote me a letter saying, "Please take all my love and go on with your life" and 13 years after I was able to say goodbye to him before he died in a VA hospital.
During 1970, when R served in the U.S. Army in Vietnam as a helicopter mechanic, he and his friends listening to music on a daily basis and especially liked Chicago's "Does Anybody Really Know What Time It Is?"
As we went through the time change this year, I remembered that song amidst the confusion in Zoom rooms where support groups comprised of people from time zones all over the world meet in a timeless and timely space.
To everything (turn, turn, turn) There is a season (turn, turn, turn) And a time to every purpose, under heaven
A time to be born, a time to die A time to plant, a time to reap A time to kill, a time to heal A time to laugh, a time to weep
To everything (turn, turn, turn) There is a season (turn, turn, turn) And a time to every purpose, under heaven
A time to build up, a time to break down A time to dance, a time to mourn A time to cast away stones, a time to gather stones together
To everything (turn, turn, turn) There is a season (turn, turn, turn) And a time to every purpose, under heaven
A time of love, a time of hate A time of war, a time of peace A time you may embrace, a time to refrain from embracing
To everything (turn, turn, turn) There is a season (turn, turn, turn) And a time to every purpose, under heaven
A time to gain, a time to lose A time to rend, a time to sew A time for love, a time for hate A time for peace, I swear it's not too late
Remembering that R found Veteran's Day to be one of the most difficult days of the year. What he wanted, above all, and found so elusive was peace of mind and heart and soul.
Update: Since I posted this morning, the air quality here has steadily diminished to the Unhealthy range with severely limited visibility. The sky is a sickly pale yellow, approaching pale orange.
As I was downloading the above video, YouTube suggested this video:
Which brought me back to what I had planned to post today, a song by Bruce Springsteen:
"The Rising" was written as a response to the terrorist attacks in the USA on the 11th September 2001. The song tells a story of a firefighter climbing up the staircase at the World Trade Center. "Come on up for the rising Come on up, lay your hands in mine Come on up for the rising Come on up for the rising tonight"
I've been saving this for a day like today:
"The Children of 9/11 are About to Vote"
Thank you to Sabine on your bicycle for the inspiration.
We said we'd walk together baby come what may That come the twilight should we lose our way If as we're walking a hand should slip free I'll wait for you And should I fall behind Wait for me
We swore we'd travel darlin' side by side We'd help each other stay in stride But each lover's steps fall so differently But I'll wait for you And if I should fall behind Wait for me
Now everyone dreams of a love lasting and true But you and I know what this world can do So let's make our steps clear that the other may see And I'll wait for you If I should fall behind Wait for me
Now there's a beautiful river in the valley ahead There 'neath the oak's bough soon we will be wed Should we lose each other in the shadow of the evening trees I'll wait for you And should I fall behind Wait for me Darlin' I'll wait for you Should I fall behind Wait for me
"There are things we take on faith, without physical proof and even sometimes without any methodology for proof. We cannot clearly show why the ending of a particular novel haunts us. We cannot prove under what conditions we would sacrifice our own life in order to save the life of our child. We cannot prove whether it is right or wrong to steal in order to feed our family, or even agree on a definition of "right" and "wrong". We cannot prove the meaning of our life, or whether life has any meaning at all. For these questions, we can gather evidence and debate, but in the end we cannot arrive at any system of analysis akin to the way in which a physicist decides how many seconds it will take a one-foot-long pendulum to make a complete swing. The previous questions are questions of aesthetics, morality, philosophy. These are questions for the arts and the humanities. These are also questions aligned with some of the intangible concerns of traditional religion.
Faith, in its broadest sense, is about far more than belief in the existence of God or the disregard of scientific evidence. Faith is the willingness to give ourselves over, at times, to things we do not fully understand. Faith is the belief in things larger than ourselves. Faith is the ability to honor stillness at some moments and at others to ride the passion and exuberance that is the artistic impulse, the flight of the imagination, the full engagement with this strange and shimmering world." - Alan Lightman
(Thanks to whiskey river for the Alan Lightman quote)
How can I be useful, of what service can I be? There is something inside me, what can it be? -- Vincent van Gogh (1853-1890)
Welcome to "37TH DREAM (RUMORS OF PEACE)".
The photograph currently at the top of my blog was taken from my porch before sunrise on October 29, 2023.
"OLD GIRL OF THE NORTH COUNTRY" (the earliest name for my blog -- http://oldgirlfromthenorthcountry.blogspot.com
) came to life in early December of 2006 so that I could post a 42-year retrospective of my paintings and drawings and through that action, create a new relationship with the day the man I loved returned from Vietnam in December 1970. For a while (sometime after spring of 2008, which is when he died) my blog was "TALKING 37TH DREAM WITH RAINBOW (RUMORS OF PEACE)". For a number of years, it's been "TALKING 37TH DREAM (RUMORS OF PEACE)." As of April 12, 2017 my blog was titled "37TH DREAM / TALKING 37TH DREAM (RUMORS OF PEACE/LOOKING UP)". Somewhere along the way it became 37TH DREAM (RUMORS OF PEACE).
To begin viewing the retrospective with narrative, scroll down to December 8, 2006, on this page:
I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. This is why right temporarily defeated is stronger than evil triumphant. -- Martin Luther King, Jr. (1929-1968)
All journeys have secret destinations of which the traveler is unaware. -- Martin Buber (1878-1965)
It is only a little planet, but how beautiful it is.
-- Robinson Jeffers
The true end of a war is the rebirth of life; the right to die peacefully in your own bed. The true end of war is the end of fear; the true end of war is the return of laughter.
-- Alfred Molano
Enjoy every sandwich -- Warren Zevon (1947-2003)
Not in God's wilds will you ever hear the sad moan, "All is vanity." No, we are paid a thousand times for all our toil, and after a single day spent outdoors in their atmosphere of strength and beauty, one could still say, should death come — even without any hope of another life — "Thank you for this most glorious gift!" and pass on.
-- John Muir (1838-1914)
Philip Henslowe: Mr. Fennyman, allow me to explain about the theatre business. The natural condition is one of insurmountable obstacles on the road to imminent disaster. Hugh Fennyman: So what do we do? Philip Henslowe: Nothing. Strangely enough, it all turns out well. Hugh Fennyman: How? Philip Henslowe: I don't know. It's a mystery.
