Getting unstuck

Witnessing this video and seeing the possibility of gradual freedom from emotional baggage was healing for me and brought these three old songs to mind:

and

and

With gratitude to Robbie Robertson (1943-2023)

 

Ghost Dance

Crow's brought the message

To the children of the sun

For the return of the buffalo

And for a better day to come

You can kill my body

You can damn my soul

For not believing in your God

And some world down below

You don't stand a chance against my prayers

You don't stand a chance against my love

They outlawed the Ghost Dance

They outlawed the Ghost Dance

But we shall live again, we shall live again

My sister above

But she has red paint

She died at Wounded Knee

Like a Latter-day Saint

You got the big drum in the distance

The blackbird's in the sky

That's a sound that you hear

When the buffalo cry

You don't stand a chance against my prayers

You don't stand a chance against my love

They outlawed the Ghost Dance

They outlawed the Ghost Dance

But we shall live again, we shall live again

We shall live again

Crazy Horse was a mystic (yeah)

He knew the secret of the trance

And Sitting Bull, the great apostle

Of the Ghost Dance

Come on Comanche

Come on Blackfoot

Come on Shoshone

Come on Cheyenne

We shall live again (we shall live again)

We shall live again (we shall live again)

Come on Arapaho

Come on Cherokee

Come on Paiute

Come on Sioux

We shall live again (we shall live again)

You used to do the Ghost Dance

Used to do the Ghost Dance

But we don't sing them kinda songs no more

Robbie Robertson & the Red Road Ensemble

*

In April 1969, R bought tickets for us and we drove up to San Francisco to Winterland to attend one of the first concerts ever given by The Band.  We were 19 years old. 

Remembering fearless Oboe / Overcoming stage fright from the beginning / Last night's dream

*

Last night's dream:

Once again I was surprised and overjoyed to find myself at the ocean, walking across a broad sandy beach to have a closer view of the waves.  Suddenly, without any warning, the ocean was far below me.  The sand and ocean in front of me had dropped hundreds of feet.  Turning in mid-air, I found a tenuous handhold and was able to hang on to the sheer cliff of hard packed sand.  Looking down, I saw that the tide had nearly reached the bottom of the cliff of sand, although there was still some beach left.  Briefly I considered letting go, confident that I would be able to sustain the fall.  Thinking again, it was clear that even though I would survive the fall, the tide was coming in and I would be in danger of drowning or at least spending a long time in the cold ocean water because there was no way to climb up the sheer cliff and no exit either way, north or south, from the beach.  I turned my attention back to the sandy beach I had just walked across with such joy.  I didn't have the strength to pull myself up onto the beach again, but I had the strength to keep holding on.   A young woman appeared out of nowhere.  I told her I needed help getting back on the beach.  She anchored herself as best she could and reached out her hands for mine.  She wasn't convinced that I could be helped and was concerned for me, but I told her not to worry.  With her help, I was able to scramble back up to the beach.  

That's when I woke up.

It's occurring to me that the ocean in my dream was to the east.  Most of my experiences of the ocean have been that it is to the west.  

Tears have been welling up with unexpected frequency in the past month.  Sacred tears.  Just in time.

"It's been a long, long, long time ..." / Cicely Tyson (1924-2021)

"... He based the chord patterns on "Sad-eyed Lady of the Lowlands," by Bob Dylan, while the song's understated arrangement partly reflects the influence of the Band's 1968 album Music From Big Pink ..."

 

Cicely Tyson (1924-2021)

Bootleg whiskey incident / "... This land is condemned all the way from New Orleans to Jerusalem ..."

Well, God is in His heaven
And we all want what’s his
But power and greed and corruptible seed
Seem to be all that there is
I’m gazing out the window
Of the St. James Hotel
And I know no one can sing the blues
Like Blind Willie McTell

Copyright © 1983 by Special Rider Music (Bob Dylan)





I live down in Bell street alley, just as drunk as I can be
I live down in Bell street alley, just as drunk as I can be
Seem like them Bell street Crow Janes, have done got rough with me

I drink so much Bell Street whiskey, they won't sell McTell no more
I drink so much Bell Street whiskey, they won't sell poor boy McTell no more
I've got the Cavenglass boys, playing all around my door

This Bell Street whiskey, make you sleep all in your clothes
That old Bell Street whiskey, make you sleep all in your clothes
And when you wake up next morning, feel like you done laid outdoors

You can get booze down on Bell Street, for two bits and a half a throw
You can get booze down on Bell Street, for two bits and a half a throw
They'll make you send out your mother and father, to just break down the jailhouse door

Walked in my room, the other night
Man come in, he want to fight
Took my gun, my right hand
Hold me people, I don't want to kill no man

When I said that, he rapped me across my head
The first shot I fired, then the man fell dead
Bell street whiskey, drove me to the county jail
Got me laying back here on my bunk, nobody in the world to go my bail

Lyrics by Blind Willie McTell

Bob Dylan, Wilco, and My Morning Jacket singing "The Weight"

Bob sounds good to me!  They all sound good.  This song has lasting power.

WAKING UP / THANKSGIVING DAY 1976

"When you awake you will remember ev'rything

you will be hangin' on a string from your...

When you believe, you will relieve the only soul

that you were born with to grow old and never know."

(lyrics from "When You Awake," by Richard Manuel and Robbie Robertson, 1969)

(I always heard the words as "you will BELIEVE WITH ALL YOUR SOUL that you were both with to grow old and never know)

Every so often I watch my VHS copy of Martin Scorsese's film, "The Last Waltz." I had forgotten that "The Last Waltz" was filmed on Thanksgiving Day in 1976. Now it seems highly appropriate that I chose to watch that exuberant concert film during this Thanksgiving weekend more than 30 years later.

The Band:
Rick Danko
Levon Helm
Garth Hudson
Richard Manuel
Robbie Robertson

Master of Ceremonies:
Bill Graham

Poets:
Lawrence Ferlinghetti
Michael McClure

Musicians:
Paul Butterfield
Eric Clapton
Neil Diamond
Dr. John
Bob Dylan
Emmylou Harris
Ronnie Hawkins
Joni Mitchell
Van Morrison
The Staples Singers
Ringo Starr
Muddy Waters
Ron Wood
Neil Young

It just occurred to me that "The Last Waltz" took place just a year and a half after the end of the Vietnam War. I can remember, in a clear and visceral way, how profoundly relieved I was when the Vietnam War finally ended. Watching the film, I thought about that short period of time when the United States was not involved in a war.

I was reminded that before my boyfriend was drafted in March of 1969, when we were both 19 years old, he had bought tickets for us and we had driven to San Francisco to see The Band in their debut concert in San Francisco on February 28, 1969. That is one of my many joyful memories of the time we spent together before he was drafted into the Army.

Recent interview with Robbie Robertson

("Morning With Three Suns," gouache and watercolor painting from 1988 by Old Girl Of The North Country)