Tuesday, December 26, 2017

Mandala #28: Family Alchemy

On December 24, I completed my 28th mandala.  According to my book on Chinese calligraphy, the character at the center of my mandala signifies "family name." My family of origin has had numerous broken places in it for many generations.  Those broken places played out again in my generation and the two generations that follow mine.

My mandala is a vision of my family of origin being healed, resulting in a new family name that reflects the healing of who-knows-how-many generations of brokenness.  At this point, I cannot imagine how that would happen, but I want to see it as possible.

As of today, I deactivated my Facebook page in hopes of alleviating some of the pain that I experience in connection with my family.  I have not posted on Facebook for over a month now and have several other ways to keep in touch with friends and family I am close to, many of whom are not on Facebook.

I am grateful for the healing that I have experienced within in connection with my family of origin, much of it in connection with having a family of choice.  There is much less pain for me than there used to be.  It is a gradual process.  Facebook has not been contributing to healing in my family of origin.

May all families be healed and whole.  May all beings be healed and whole.


Sabine said...

Very moving. I am always looking forward to your mandalas.

I, too deactivated my fb account on my 60th birthday. It felt right to stop this intrusive, childish, almost addictive pretense of familiarity and friendship. And you know something? None of my fb *friends* has noticed.

am said...

Sabine -- Thank you for understanding and for letting me know that you made the same decision recently. Back in 2014, I deleted my first Facebook page after having it for a short period of time. The only reason I had it was in hopes of connecting with a young family member who only communicated through Facebook. He didn't respond to my "friend" request due to family problems that have yet to be resolved.

When I was looking for a job in 2015, I had to create either a Facebook page or a LinkedIn page. I had a bad experience with Linkedin in the past and was not going to engage with them again, and chose to create a new Facebook page. There might be occasions when I might want to activate it briefly, but I am done with having it be a part of my daily life. I know for sure that I have an addictive personality (!) and am conscious that I have a choice about spending time and emotional energy in connection with Facebook.

Anonymous said...

I love your mandalas, and I love the stories that inspire them. I prefer blogging over Facebook always. Here we tell our stories and draw those to us who inhabit our world with passion, creativity, sincerity, inquisitiveness, fear, joy, and love. We create our histories together. The only reason I keep my Facebook account is because so many of my friends don't blog! Keep on bloggin'!

am said...

"We create our histories together."


You and roger were among my very first blog friends. I sensed right away that blogging is a way to discover kindred spirits and in many ways it has become a return to letter writing between good friends in plural, as a feeling of community grows from blogging. My life is richer for blogging. I'll be keeping on bloggin'!

Thank you for loving my mandalas and my stories!

My life so far said...

Families are complicated aren't they? And Facebook is definitely a time sucker.

Thanks for visiting my blog:)

37paddington said...

I love your mandala practice. This post makes me want to look into it for myself. Some parts of our extended generations are very broken, too, and one branch of the more immediate family is estranged, with the result that my children no longer interact with cousins that they were very close to growing up. It is very painful, and one of my goals for 2018 is to release my attachment to a particular outcome on that front, and to just what is, be, and unfold. Thank you for the very poignant wishes you share here. Your generosity of spirit will open the way.

am said...

lily cedar -- Thank you for commenting here. May all our families be healed!

37paddington -- Thank you for voicing that goal for the broken places in your family. It is my goal, too, to let go of my desire for a particular outcome. There is freedom and relief in being able to do that. I hope that you find time to make a mandala. Each one leads to another.